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Posts Tagged ‘Father’s Day’

Life Is Weird

June 17, 2018 Leave a comment

I’ve slept a lot in the last twenty-four hours. Made the climb up the stairs, glance out the window before climbing into bed, wrapping myself up in blankets and drifting into unconsciousness. I’d woken up a few hours later, come downstairs and made myself a sandwich, then repeated the process listed above. Then again, then again.

I’ve lost track of how long, broken up over a day, that I’ve slept. It feels like too much, it feels like not enough.

Sleeping is a coping mechanism for me, as it was for my father. When things got to be too overwhelming, when everything seemed it’s bleakest, my father would turn off the lights, turn on the fan, and crawl into bed. Now, I do the same. I’m a lot like him, in a lot of ways. Some of them make me proud, some of them make me wonder.

Father’s Day is today, as of this writing, and I just never know how to feel on this day anymore. Every time it comes around, I reach for the phone to call my dad and tell him I love him. Every time I do, it hits me all over again that he won’t be on the other end of that phone.


bourdain

Anthony Bourdain passed away last week, another life claimed by suicide, and it has hit me considerably hard. I did not know Bourdain, had never met him or spoken with him in any capacity, but through reading his books and following his television shows (No Reservations/Parts Unknown), I felt like I did. Through reading various articles he’d written, various interviews with him, I felt like we all got a glimpse of his soul. A soul that was scarred and embattled.

Bourdain’s struggle with mental health was never a secret, was never kept hidden from viewers of his shows. No, in fact, Bourdain was always a champion of speaking out, be it in interviews or on Twitter, about depression and mental health issues. He always seemed like someone who had been deep in the fight for many years, always punching upward, but that made him one to admire and respect.

For someone who suffers from depression, for someone who has dealt with this pain his whole life, to see someone like Bourdain going out there and shining a light on so many problems in our society (the #MeToo movement and harassment/abuse in all industries, causes dealing with mental health, being critical of political regimes including our own what are bordering tyranny) and doing it with such wisdom and charisma… It made an impact. It gave me hope.

But to lose such a vital voice in this time of strife, to lose such an important warrior in the current culture war blowing up outside, is devastating. I had said on Twitter that losing Bourdain now is very much akin to losing Hunter S. Thompson during the G.W. Bush administration at the beginning of the (latest) Iraq war. A modern scholar who has a unique take on life and the world around them because they have had unique experiences, had survived unique trials and tribulations, and were made better for them.

My heart hurts, not just for the loss of a television travel host, but for the loss of one of the most vocal proponents of the fact that we are all the same people living on the same planet. We should respect one another, we should care for one another, we should put all this strife and pettiness behind us and focus on healing the world and making it a better place. Showing us the beauty of different cultures, their histories and art, to make it less scary that these cultures are “them”. In fact, that there is no “them”. Only “us”.

To know that Bourdain’s death was self inflicted, that his demons had finally overpowered him, that the darkness was too strong for him to fight it anymore, is what has hit me the hardest. To know that a man like Bourdain, who had been through so much, seen so much, been connected to the entire world in such a unique and powerful way, was still taken over by such sadness that he would hang himself… It scares me to my core.


It’s raining again.

I think blogging about things is helping. I think I’ll continue.

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General Nerdery | No Spoilers | Happy Father’s Day

June 16, 2013 Leave a comment

GAME OF THRONES HIATUS: WEEK ONE

* First Sunday without Game of Thrones. The walls are closing in like so many White Walkers. I can hear the wind howling from outside and though it is bright and warm as the sun beams down from the heavens above, I know the truth. Winter is coming. I can feel it in my bones. I only wish it were not so far away.

* I was certain that I would handle this better. I was certain it would not hurt this much. I know now that certainty means nothing when faced with the unique adversity of being without one of your favorite shows for almost a year. I know now that the pain will not subside until I can once again see the beauty of Westeros on my television screen. I must deal with this pain until then.

* Luckily, as an avid Game of Thrones viewer, I have grown accustomed to pain.

The people of the internet are very divided in their opinion of Zack Snyder’s Man of Steel. Half of the internet have called it the best Superman movie so far, while the other half refuse to call it a Superman movie at all.

Having seen it, I am in the latter half of the internet.

Once I stopped thinking of it as a Superman film and started looking at it as a summer blockbuster film involving aliens and big explosions, fight scenes and bloated visuals, I was able to enjoy it. But do not be fooled. Anyone going into this movie expecting a film about Superman will be sorely disappointed. The main character in this film is named Kal-El of Krypton, he goes by the Earth name of Clark Kent, he dons a red and blue costume with a large “S” on the front and flies around with a flowing red cape behind him. He is even referred to as Superman on more than one occasion, but none of that matters. This man is an impostor.

I will not spoil the events of the film that lead me to say these words. The only thing I will say to those of you who have not yet seen it and are confused by what I’m saying is this: The Superman in this film crosses lines the Superman we all know and love would never cross.

As I said, I was able to enjoy the film for what it was. The cast is amazing, Amy Adams as Lois Lane especially, and Henry Cavill need not shoulder the blame for the events in this film as he did the best job he could with the script he was given. That is the root of the issues with this movie, the true source of the many flaws that weigh down Man of Steel; The writing.

The fault, I feel, lay not with the director, Zack Snyder. Anyone who enters this movie with prior knowledge of his directorial style will not be surprised by how the movie looks. Snyder delivers an enjoyable summer blockbuster, but the little kid in me who used to run around his living room with a red cape towel hanging from his back was very disappointed.

There you have it, the line has been drawn in the sand. I am on my side of this heated internet debate, and now you must see the film and decide on which side you find yourself. But do not allow anyone to determine for you whether or not you should see this movie. I urge you to see it for yourself, with an open mind, and to only then decide how much of this movie you’re able to take.

And of course, today is Father’s Day. So I would be remiss if I didn’t commemorate the event with a tasteless Batman image: